Thursday, April 4, 2013

Norwegian Nine tells her story (part 1 one in a series)

By Jaesun 

I want to make readers and followers aware of what lifes adoptees may be forced to through... -------just telling my own story is of course tragic and horrible on its own. But I want to do more than just tell my story and that is why I asked a dear friend of mine (whom I never actually met in person) if she'd be willing to share her story....

Korean girl (Wkimedia Commons)  not related  to the authors in any way.

When I was born and ultimately surrendered for adoption Korean adoption "was considered safe" and I suspect it had become quite popular too... Honestly I was born in the peak period of Korean adoption so even though I consider my experiences and memories valid and justified they alone cannot give an accurate picture of what it's like to be a Korean adoptee. In all fareness that would mean I'd have to retell the stories from over 10000 adoptees (over 200000 adoptees have been adopted all in all so far, including males).

Not surprisingly USA is on the top of the list for those countries who has adopted the most Korean children, followed by France, Sweden , Denmark , Norway, the Netherlands, Belgium, Australia, Germany and Canada. The mentioned countries has adopted over 1000 Korean children....There are several more but those I mentioned are the ones that have used the Korean adoption system the most.

This what my Norwegian friend Nine told me of her story and herself...
I was about one year old when I was adopted. My journal said I was two years old, but as we know today Holt and many more agency’s falsified papers, so mine is full of lies. I was teased at school when I was little because of my looks and because of my Asian face. I experienced lots of bad stuff in my adoptive home, my adoptive parents just loved the bottle more than us kids, and I was very neglected as a kid. Today I have papers that say: if I had prosecuted my adoptive parents while they were alive they would have had to face several years in jail for severe neglection of me and a lot of abuse. Like beating, not giving me things a child need: clothes, food, support, love, comfort but instead I was met with hate, a burden throughout their lives. I was the one who prolonged their suffering and their debt, on the house, because I added to the cost so much. They had taken a loan on the house to get me. That's what I heard when I was little.

I was a very scared little girl while I was growing up, and I have scars today, because of it. I was told lots of hurtful stuff, like I was very ugly, I was an idiot, the black sheep and of course a whore when I was in my teens. My childhood and teens was one huge ocean of tears, sorrow, longing after my real family, natural family. I always knew I was adopted, I saw that early on in the mirror. My life been a hell on earth from I came, and as an adult Asian adoptee I now face racism by grown up men. They think I come from Thailand and ask me how much do I take per hour? They see me as a whore because of my Asian look. Not all men, but it’s there. Since so many Norwegian men nowadays take so called sex trips to Thailand for that purpose and finding themselves an obedient wife. 

Well I am the youngest of my three other sisters in Korea, I am in touch with one of them a little bit. I may have an Uncle still and some cousins, maybe an aunt on my mother’s side. We were totally six children, but because of poverty and illness my only brother died very young, and a sister too died to early. My Mum died of heart problems some months after I was born, so my Dad was let alone with four kids when his wife died. He began to drink out of sorrow and despair, he gambled too, he tried to give us food on the table but the task was too hard on him, it was only 15 years after the Korean war had ended and there were so many things who went wrong that year in 1969 when I was born, so he had to deliver me to a children’s home for a while. It was never meant forever, but just until he could feed us all. He did come back for me, to take me back home one day. But then I was sent abroad without his knowing or consent. So they obviously told him a lie, because he searched the rest of his life after me in Korea.

So I have ended up being one of them so called angry adoptees, I fight for justice and hope to see adoption abolished someday. We lose too much as adoptees, our names, mothers tongue, culture, close family, love and the feeling of belonging somewhere, see the mirror of who you are, in the face of our natural Mums and Dads that is only few of us who experience, and it is so sad. 

I was in Korea in 1986 a long time ago now:) I have not been there since, one day I wll go to visit a lonely grave where my parents are buried in the land I hate and love. To hopefully close my circle in life, get some peace. 

I always been a lonely wolf, not felt I belonged anywhere and I always dreamt of my Inner peace, but I have to chase after it still and now I am in my 40's. I have two grown up kids now, one 14 years old and one 20 years old, both mixed, I met a real Viking when I was 19 years old:) we got married early so for me to get two daughters in life is a great blessing, I have given them everything I never got in life that is the only difference I think, being an adoptee mum. We are more aware of little things, like giving lots of love, smiles, support, show them they are really loved for what they are. 

This story is a true story from a female Korean adult adoptee. In the following months instead of reading my own stories you will be offered the oppertunity to read stories from female Korean adult adoptees...